ang labo talaga ng mundo.

ang sabi nila pag mahal mo ang isang tao, magbabago ka para sa kanya. kahit na mahal ka niya, babaguhin mo lahat ng ayaw niya sayo. gagawin mo ang lahat para mas matanggap ka niya at mas "mahalin" ka niya. kasi mahal mo siya.

sabi din nila pag mahal mo ang isang tao, tatanggapin mo siya kung sino siya. gaano man siya kalala, titiisin mo ang mga ayaw mo sa kanya dahil mahal mo siya. love is blind nga di ba?

amputch.

gaguhan ba ito?

alin ba talaga?

hinahalungkat ko na naman ang aking tabulas account. matagal ko nang ndi un ginagawa. tas narating ko ang account ng hs friend ko. astig ng linyang nakita ko.

 

"People leave you because they are not joined to you. And if they are not joined to you, you can't make them stay. You've got to know when it's over. Stop begging people to stay.. Let them go"

 

tama. tama.

binabasa mo bang maigi? good. intindihin mo. ilagay sa utak. itatak sa puso. ok?

--

may nangyari sa ym. nakakahiya sobra. sa uulitin, hindi nako magpapatama gamit ang status sa ym. grabe ang kahihiyan ko ngayon. ndi ko maexplain.

--

sobrang tagal kong nawala. siguro dahil masyadong busy. o wala lang talaga sa mood magsulat. pero madami akong gusto isulat dati. kaso ang problema, wala na akong maisip na isulat ngayon. kung kelan kaharap ko na itong tabulas.

parang isang tao. nung may pagkakataon ka pa para magsalita, ndi ka nagsasalita. tapos nung wala na ung chance para sabihin un, saka mo naman maiisipang sabihin. bket ba ganun tayo? halos lahat ng tao ganun. nagpapalagpas ng pagkakataon para magsalita. ndi tayo masyadong mahilig i-grab ang opportunity na ganun. pansin ko lang. o baka ako lang un.

 --

first day kong suotin ang glasses ko. nakakapanibago. hindi ko aakalain na magsasalamin ako. ako ata ang pinakaunang tao sa pamilya ko na magsasalamin.

ang nakakatawa pa dun, ndi ko napapansin na malabo na pala paningin ko. akala ko ganun lang talaga ang mga bagay bagay. tapos paglabas ko ng clinic at suot-suot ko na ang glasses, biglang ang linaw na ng mga bagay bagay. ano un? kelangan ko pa ba ng glasses para makita ng malinaw ang mga nakikita ko? ganun din ba sa mga nangyayare sken? san ako makakahanap ng glasses na magpapalinaw sken ng mga bagay bagay?  kelangan ko ata nun. para naman matauhan nako. ayoko ko kasi iumpog ang ulo ko e.

--

astig. nagpatarot card ako kanina kay micko. astig kc totoo lahat ng lumabas. pati ung guy na tinanong ko saktong sakto. at thank god nagpatarot ako. i mean, mas naprove ko sa sarili ko na mali ito. hanggang dun lang un. siguro naghahanap lang ako ng ibang bagay na magsasabi sken na kahibangan ito. kalokohan lang at dapat itigil na. baka masaktan uli ako. kasi naman siya. masyadong niya kong pinagiisip sa mga ginagawa niya sken. lahat ng tao pare-pareho ang sinasabi tungkol sa kanya. at ndi lang ako ang nakakapansin sa mga pinaggagagawa niya. sana tigilan na nya ako. ang hirap kasi umiwas. ang hirap talaga.

--

      

    

gusto mo ba ng good time?

bagot ka na ba sa buhay mong panay aral na lang?

matagal-tagal na ba mula nang makapanood ka ng isang magandang palabas?

     

kung OO...

  

   

Kami ay nang-aanyaya sa panibagong produksyon ng HARLEQUIN THEATRE GUILD ng DLSU-Manila na pinamagatang ISANG BUHAY SA TAMBAKAN ng National Artist for Literature na si Rolando Tinio.

   

   

*hinga*

     

Ano? Di mo kilala si Rolando Tinio? Sige na nga. Pagbibigyan kita. Eto, para may idea ka. Tingnan mo to. (Sus!)

      

Ito ay itatanghal sa William Shaw Little Theatre (WSLT) sa loob ng campus. Ito ay magaganap sa mga ss. na show dates:

    

AUGUST 3, Wednesday (UBREAK SHOW)

1:00-2:30 pm

AUGUST 4, Thursday

6:30-8:00 pm

AUGUST 6, Saturday (2 SHOWS)

10am & 3pm

     

  

      

---  

Sa halagang Php. 110 lang, masasabi mo sa sarili mong nakitikim ka na patuloy na pagyabong ng kultura at sining sa bansang Pilipinas.

     

    

Ano? Game ka ba? Siguraduhin mo lang na kakayanin mo ito. Bawal dito ang papatay-patay!

   

   

Ngayon, kung desidido ka na talagang makisali sa pagbabagong ito, i-text mo lang ang numerong ito: 0919-5059795 o mag-email ka sa mkaye14@yahoo.com.

   

   

Kung ako sa iyo, maghahatak ako ng mga kasama ko, kasi kapag marami kayo, maaari kayong bigyan ng discount! Yan eh kung marami talaga kayo ha.

    

Ano? Kunin na ang cellphone o magpipipindot na ng keyboard at kontakin na kami!

   

     

   

Ang hindi pumansin nito, LOSER!!!

   

   

---end of message---

i so hate the world today. its 3pm already and i have a 230pm submission of a project. which i haven't passed yet. i'm still looking for a place or a computer to burn my project in a cd... and this song keeps on singing in my head:

I hate the world today / Your so good to me, I know/ / But I can’t change / Tried to tell you but you looked at me like maybe I’m an angel underneath / Innocent and sweet

Yesterday I cried (actually, it was this morning that i cried) / You must have been relieved to see the softer side / I can understand how you’d be so confused / I don’t envy you / I’m a little bit of everything / All rolled into one

I’m a bitch / I’m a lover / I’m a child / I’m a mother / I’m a sinner / I’m a saint / I do not feel ashamed / I’m your hell / I’m you dream I’m nothing in between / You know you wouldn’t want it any other way

So take me as I am / This may mean you’ll have to be a stronger man / Rest assured that when I start to make you nervous / And I’m going to extremes / Tomorrow I will change / And today won’t mean a thing

I’m a bitch / I’m a lover / I’m a child / I’m a mother / I’m a sinner / I’m a saint / I do not feel ashamed / I’m your hell / I’m you dream / I’m nothing in between / You know you wouldn’t want it any other way

Just when you think you got me figured out / The season’s already changin’ / I think it’s cool you do whatcha do / And don’t try to save me

I’m a bitch / I’m a lover / I’m a child / I’m a mother / I’m a sinner / I’m a saint / I do not feel ashamed / I’m your hell / I’m you dream / I’m nothing in between / You know you wouldn’t want it any other way

I’m a bitch / I’m a tease / I’m a goddess on my knees / When you’re hurt / When you suffer / I’m your angel undercover / I’ve been numb / I’m revived / Can’t say I’m not alive / You know I wouldn’t want it any other way

--

at sobrang init pa!!! argh!

---

it's holy week. it's our one-week semi-vacation (hooray! -im being sarcastic here.) it's our time to reflect on our sins. it's the time of the year to "go back to God".

it is holy week.  my sister is not here.  she's in Batangas sun bathing.  while here i am, stuck in our house.  with gazillion things to do.  with million projects to do.  with so many things to do.

it's holy week and all i see is people going to the church.  even to the beach. 

--

people are so hypocrites nowadays.  sorry with my words.  but i am getting sarcastic now.  i even admit that i am one of those people.

i went to our school's chapel last feb,  to attend ash wednesday.  i was not planning to go but there i was in the crowded small chapel waiting for the priest to finally put ash in our forehead.  anyway, i was really surprised to see these people crowding inside and outside the chapel.  it was as if they were awaken by some force in time for the ash wednesday.  and i think i am one of them.

i admit.  i just go to the church on special occassion.  my family just go to the church during xmas, new year, palm sunday, easter sunday etc.

so i am one of those hypocrites people that "God" should be punishing right now.  why quote-unquote God?  coz right now, my mind has been corrupted by philosophy already. 

and why the hell do i call these people, including myself, a hypocrite?  it's simple.  i call myself, we call ourselves a "Christian", a "Catholic".  but only in papers.  only a few of us actually live the virtue of being a Christian.  we are hypocrites.  i think all of us are hypocrites.  if someone would ask me to name people who i could call a real Christian, there would be no one that i would mention.  do i know someone who really live accdg to the word of God? or is it the word of Man?

i am confused on what is really the Truth.  is there really a God?  or is he just a figment of man's imagination?  is there really a God or did we just made him up to compensate for the lack of explanation in our life?  did we made God just to have someone to blame our mistakes and mishaps in life?  "kasalanan to ng diyos...ito ang gusto ng diyos e...siguro ito ang way ng diyos para parusahan tayo..."etc. 

--

when i was watching the news last night, i saw several people reenacting Jesus' death.  Penitensya.  they were willingly suffering just like what happened to Jesus.  but for the sake of what?  for the tourists' pleasure and entertainment?  for the fact that people will see them suffering too?  or is it for there own good?  in what way?  i mean, i don't really get it.  until now i don't understand why the heck they are doing those morbid things.  to repent on their sins?  isn't it there are still other ways that could "repent their sins"?  i mean, something that could benefit not just theirselves but also the others.  that would be better than having real/reel blood on their bodies.

i think this is not the time to write this kind of stuff.  but i just can't help it.  im just in the mood to babble away.

--

my hell week sked:

(the gazillion things that i have to do)

* March 28 (M) - Biocol2 courseware - coral reefs

* March 29 (T) - Litera1 Premio Cruz.  400-630pm.  WSLT.

* March 29 (T) - Intphil Reaction Paper on PNPRS talk

* March 30 (W) - Philhis Oral defense - underemployment

* March 31 (Th) - Intphil Finals - 6 Philosophers on God

* March 31 (Th) - Anmath3 Quiz3

* March 31 (Th) - Biocol2 Act 5

* March 31 (Th) - HTG AQUA Check. 6pm.

* April 1 (F) - Philhis Finals - MTV

* April 4 (M) - Biocom2 courseware - coral reefs

* Intphil notes - type it!

* HTG AQUA Check collateral of documents (Oct 2004 - March 2005)

--

Litera1 Premio Cruz.  my Litera1 class S14, which consists of 18 students only, are required to perform "Marjorie" by Isagani Cruz on March 29 at WSLT.  it is somehow a tribute to Isagani Cruz (he's going to retire soon.)  hope our class win this.  plus points if ever we win.  hopefully!  im finished with the blockings and all i have to think of is where the hell am i gonna get my costume?! and what about the lights that i need.  and our sounds.  and our props.  shet!  and the time given for us to rehearse is on monday night.  one night only!  oh no.  i dont think we can pull this off...but pam and i are really hoping to win this.  pinaubaya smen ng prof namen ang play nato, kelangan namin ipakita na kaya namen!  harlequin ata to.

---

ang weird nung lumabas sa personality disorder test ko...kaya tiningnan ko ung meaning.


Paranoid : High
Paranoid personality disorder is characterized by a distrust of others and a constant suspicion that people around you have sinister motives. People with this disorder tend to have excessive trust in their own knowledge and abilities and usually avoid close relationships with others. They search for hidden meanings in everything and read hostile intentions into the actions of others. They are quick to challenge the loyalties of friends and loved ones and often appear cold and distant to others. They usually shift blame to others and tend to carry long grudges.

Schizoid : Low
People with schizoid personality disorder avoid relationships and do not show much emotion. They genuinely prefer to be alone and do not secretly wish for popularity. They tend to seek jobs that require little social contact. Their social skills are often weak and they do not show a need for attention or acceptance. They are perceived as humorless and distant and often are termed "loners."

Schizotypal : High
Many believe that schizotypal personality disorder represents mild schizophrenia. The disorder is characterized by odd forms of thinking and perceiving, and individuals with this disorder often seek isolation from others. They sometimes believe to have extra sensory ability or that unrelated events relate to them in some important way. They generally engage in eccentric behavior and have difficulty concentrating for long periods of time. Their speech is often over elaborate and difficult to follow.

Antisocial : Moderate
A common misconception is that antisocial personality disorder refers to people who have poor social skills. The opposite is often the case. Instead, antisocial personality disorder is characterized by a lack of conscience. People with this disorder are prone to criminal behavior, believing that their victims are weak and deserving of being taken advantage of. They tend to lie and steal. Often, they are careless with money and take action without thinking about consequences. They are often agressive and are much more concerned with their own needs than the needs of others.

Borderline : Moderate
Borderline personality disorder is characterized by mood instability and poor self-image. People with this disorder are prone to constant mood swings and bouts of anger. Often, they will take their anger out on themselves, causing themselves injury. Suicidal threats and actions are not uncommon. They think in very black and white terms and often form intense, conflict-ridden relationships. They are quick to anger when their expectations are not met.

Histrionic : Moderate
People with histrionic personality disorder are constant attention seekers. They need to be the center of attention all the time, often interrupting others in order to dominate the conversation. They use grandiose language to discribe everyday events and seek constant praise. They may dress provacatively or exaggerate illnesses in order to gain attention. They also tend to exaggerate friendships and relationships, believing that everyone loves them. They are often manipulative.

Narcissistic : High
Narcissistic personality disorder is characterized by self-centeredness. Like histrionic disorder, people with this disorder seek attention and praise. They exaggerate their achievements, expecting others to recongize them as being superior. They tend to be choosy about picking friends, since they believe that not just anyone is worthy of being their friend. They tend to make good first impressions, yet have difficulty maintaining long-lasting relationships. They are generally uninterested in the feelings of others and may take advantage of them.

Avoidant : Moderate
Avoidant personality disorder is characterized by extreme social anxiety. People with this disorder often feel inadequate, avoid social situations, and seek out jobs with little contact with others. They are fearful of being rejected and worry about embarassing themselves in front of others. They exaggerate the potential difficulties of new situations to rationalize avoiding them. Often, they will create fantasy worlds to substitute for the real one. Unlike schizoid personality disorder, avoidant people yearn for social relations yet feel they are unable to obtain them. They are frequently depressed and have low self-confidence.

Dependent : High
Dependent personality disorder is characterized by a need to be taken care of. People with this disorder tend to cling to people and fear losing them. They may become suicidal when a break-up is imminent. They tend to let others make important decisions for them and often jump from relationship to relationship. They often remain in abusive relationships. They are overly sensitive to disapproval. They often feel helpless and depressed.

Obsessive-Compulsive : High
Obsessive-Compulsive personality disorder is similar to obsessive-compulsive anxiety disorder. People with this disorder are overly focused on orderliness and perfection. Their need to do everything "right" often interferes with their productivity. They tend to get caught up in the details and miss the bigger picture. They set unreasonably high standards for themselves and others, and tend to be very critical of others when they do not live up to these high standards. They avoid working in teams, believing others to be too careless or incompetent. They avoid making decisions because they fear making mistakes and are rarely generous with their time or money. They often have difficulty expressing emotion.

--
oh no. nagagalit na si by. hehe..di ko kc ginagawa ung litera paper ko. wahahaha..katamad!!! di ba?

tas gutom pa ko.

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	High
Schizoid:	Low
Schizotypal:	High
Antisocial:	Moderate
Borderline:	Moderate
Histrionic:	Moderate
Narcissistic:	High
Avoidant:	Moderate
Dependent:	High
Obsessive-Compulsive:	High
-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --